Still A Little Hazy

She’s back. That version of me I worked so hard to step away from 11 months ago is creeping back out from the shadows.

She’s anxious and lonely. She’s tired and irritable. She lacks the drive she had just mere weeks ago.

What happened? What brought these struggles back to the forefront of her reality?

The simple answer is nothing. This is what it means to live with a chemical imbalance. Sometimes days, weeks, or mere moments are just harder.

I know this will pass. I also know there are actions I can take to get through the fog a little quicker.

The more complex answer is that I’ve been doing a bad job lately. I’ve been neglectful - neglectful of Lou, of this journey, of myself. I’ve been ignoring my needs and as a result have been a lesser version of myself.

The things I need:

-       Alone time.

-       Adequate sleep.

-       A tidy/clean living space.

-       Daily movement with Lou.

-       A balanced diet.

-       A routine.

So here’s to acknowledging the struggle, rather than riding it out alone in my cute little apartment. Tomorrow is another clean slate – another new start. Let’s make it count, friends.